I think I missed a week in this category. It certainly wasn’t because there was a dearth of things worthy of our thoughts and prayers. Hardly. I just could not get past the media hype about Michael Jackson (you don’t really need me to make a hotlink for him, do you?) to find anything really meaningful to say there and then there’s the fact that we got a new puppy (!!!!!) and so now I am sleep deprived. Throw in a couple of deadlines . . . and anyway, those are my excuses.
But last night, lying in bed, I was catching up on some old New York Times newspapers and I came across an essay in the Sunday Styles section (always the first place I go on a Sunday because of its guilty pleasure combination of worthy writing about usually unworthy subjects). Anyway, the first thing I read in the section is the Modern Love essay. This is written each week by a different person and always has to do with the accommodations people make in their lives to find room for love – of a significant other, a child, a parent, a passion – anything. Usually, these are a good read. Once in a while they really suck. And occasionally, for me, they hit a home run. That happened last week in the June 28 issue of the paper.
In that day’s essay, “Raising a Princess Single-Handedly,” Simon Van Booy wrote about the way he and his four-year-old daughter are learning to live together as a family after the sudden death of his wife, her mother. This is a subject that hits home for me. As many of you know, I have two sons – but they are really my stepsons. I married their father after their mother died suddenly, just before Christmas. They boys were then 6 and 8. And I remember how they and their father tried to put their lives together after that lightning bolt. So when I read this piece, it really resonated as true.
I think it also struck me because today would have been my best friend’s 45th birthday. Happy Birthday, Darrell. I love you.
So this week, I ask that as we use our prayer beads, we say a round for all those who suffer the loss of a close family member or other dear loved one. Here’s a prayer to get you started:
May we discover through pain and torment,
the strength to live with grace and humor.
May we discover through doubt and anguish,
the strength to live with dignity and holiness.
May we discover through suffering and fear,
the strength to move toward healing.
May it come to pass that we be restored to health and to vigor.
May Life grant us wellness of body, spirit, and mind.
And if this cannot be so, may we find in this transformation and passage
moments of meaning, opportunities for love
and the deep and gracious calm that comes
when we allow ourselves to move on.
- Rabbi Rami M. Shapiro (as posted on Beliefnet.com)
Kimberly, thank you for the beautiful prayer. I can always use more on this subject. I also love this new segment to your blog. I don’t watch the news or read the papers often because it tends to really bring me down. So, I find it really good to be reminded of others through your blog.
I’m so happy that you got a new puppy! What have you named it and what kind is it? I wish you would post a bit on it. We want to celebrate this happiness with you! I know I’m not the only one who wants to see a picture. We have not added a new dog to our lives yet. We lost our cat in Nov. and one of our dogs in April. I want to add another, but we’re still looking. Barkley is really enjoying being the only one right now, but he does need someone to play with.
Looking forward to more news on your pup.
Kimberly,
I so appreciate this post and the heart and candor you put into your writing. I also appreciate the prayer you’ve shared by Rabbi Rami. Yes, may we pray for all those who are suffer through the loss of a loved one. For all those who suffer. Whatever beads we use, prayer forms we use (I do metta), may our hearts be inclined toward the One within the all.
May you be blessed…